Too Much....

Things you do for a girl. You wait by the phone for them wondering when they’ll text you. Wondering if today would be the day where she’ll actually make the first move and text you good morning. She seems to always text the good night. I guess that’s the way it is. You being eager to start the day and she being eager to end it. There’s also the thing where you make a plan for a girl and found out that she cant go out that day. Guess that was my fault. Should’ve asked her if she was available that day. Guess there’s not enough of her to go around. I had plan to go catch a movie and then go eat at her favorite restaurant, with her of course. Didn’t quite work out on her part. I just wanted to be a little spontaneous. There’s also the no texting when you’re out with her. I ignored my texts while I was hanging out with her. I thought it would be inappropriate for me to be texting. It’s like a sort of insult saying like you’re boring so I rather text my friend. As we were hanging out, she kept reaching into her bag and getting her phone, texting a friend she met at orientation. Well, I guess, that is more quite interesting than hanging out with me. I guess I can try all I want and still be boring. Cant always be fun. =[ She gives me a bracelet she made for me at orientation proving to me that she thought about me at orientation. YES! Finally I did something that implemented me inside her head a little. I wear the bracelet. I wear it even when I go out. Its pretty with pink blue and green glow in the dark beads. I lend her my watch that’s a bit loose on her. She wears it for five seconds and takes it off. I tell her to bring it home and give it back the next time we hang out. She goes okay but I’m pretty sure that when she got home, she threw it on her table or hid it or something. I just wanted to give her something so that she can remember. Then there’s the waiting for the next time you hang out. Sometimes you can get played and mess up your entire schedule. One time, we were suppose to watch a scary movie. I had a four day weekend till school and she had two weeks or so. I was really eager to spend time with her and decided to leave all my four days open so that whatever day she can make time for me, it would work. That didn’t quite work out. She made plans already. Sigh. She tell me that she fell for me but it doesn’t quite seem like it. I trust her but she kind of makes it unconvincing. Why do I do this? Why do I make time for a girl that from my point of view looks like she doesn’t make time for me. I ask that question to myself tonight. Thinking and thinking of why I do this. Why do I wait by the phone? Why do I try to be spontaneous? Why do I ignore my texts? Why do I give her my watch? Why do I make time? I think and hope that the answer is because I am falling for her too. Call me too attached but it’s probably cuz I don’t want to lose her or I want to show her how I’m feeling about her. I guess she’ll never know. It’s not that she’s dumb. I don’t know what else to do. I want to kind of make it a puzzle for her to figure out instead of telling her. I have tried telling her though but I guess she doesn’t believe me or she isn’t confident. Well, all I know is that I tried and that everyday and every night, I’ll still wait for her. Some people might say, why are you doing this? Doing so much for a girl that doesn’t seem to appreciate it at all. Well, I know she will one day. And it doesn’t matter how long or how short, ill sit by that phone and hope that one day, she’ll figure it out and find out that I will be that patient guy. The spontaneous guy. The committed guy. The guy who will always be there for her. Thee right guy.